Jada Pickett provides thoughts for those who jump over the broom.
You came to see me last night to tell me that you have decided to get a divorce. Last night I only listened, but this morning I woke up with a hope for you. For the past five years, I have been meeting with elders who have been married for 25+ years to get understanding from many perspectives as to what marriage and love is all about. Almost all the couples have said that at some point in their marriage they have stumbled upon inevitably difficult moments that called for a break. I spoke to one couple who had a few years apart only to re-discover their desire to grow old together and to do what was necessary to continue to deepen their love for one another. My hope for you is this, that you consider taking the route that some of our elders have taken in giving your marriage some space and time before the drastic decision of divorce. Answers to big questions need time to find lasting truth vs the truth of the moment. After this process the answer may be the same, but at least you will have the clarity to go about it all with certainty and integrity, but you may also find that spark that could save and rekindle your marriage.
My humble thoughts.
Source: Jada Pickett’s Facebook Page”
And I say: The manifestation of clarity is witnessed by the beholder when what seems like twisted truths and when what seems like humble truths are systematically labored over until the mind finds an answer.
Many of our elders help the generations behind them find clarity, when they do not discount the great gifts the elders bring to them, through guided wisdom. For instance, my parents, my grandparents and other patriarchs and matriarchs in my family taught me to value my unblemished love and taught me to value my untarnished soul even when turmoil arises. Most importantly, my elders taught me to enter a relationship without superficial needs, which is a starting point when building a long term healthy relationship that is free of mental and physical abuse.
When you are in a relationship where abuse is present, as my elders say, “it is time to move on before bitterness sets-in, because in the real world bitterness never truly leaves.” You must open yourself up and move forward to find happiness and allow it to come to you.
Happiness comes to you when you look at the passage of time without looking through rose-colored glasses. Happiness comes to you when you are in a relationship with a person who organically loves your mind, your body and your soul.
Source: Vanessa G. Turner